Help me find a serious relationship

Help me find a serious relationship

Dear Amy -

I am ready for a serious relationship, but every guy I meet seems to be very against that whole idea.  I hate to think that male stereotype is true, but I can’t help but wonder if it’s even possible to find someone who wants the same kind of relationship I do.  Is he out there?  What should I do?

Thanks for writing!

The operative words here are “Every guy you meet.” There are a lot more guys in the world then the ones that you meet?  Be careful not to create generalizations about groups of people based on very small numbers.  For example, how many men are you actually meeting?  How many are you actually going on a date with?  1 per week, 2 per week?  And where did you meet them?  Did you find out prior to dating them if they were interested in a serious relationship?  The point is, there are plenty of men out there who want a serious relationship. 

I have two bits of advice for you.

1.  Shop in the right department store.  If you want to meet available men looking for relationships then find out prior to dating whether that is something they are interested in. Online dating has become the “rage” and their profiles usually let you know exactly what they are looking for.  That should at least put you in the right area to find what you are looking for.

2.  Get Some Feedback.  Once you are sure you are in the right department store, then, you’ve got to determine if there is a fit.  If you have been shopping in the right department store and there isn’t a fit, time to look inward?  Are your expectations too high or unrealistic?  Are you sure you even know what you want?  Do you take care of yourself and your health?  Are you confident around men – are you able to show your personality or do you hold back?  Are you sabotaging perfect opportunities and don’t know how or why?  Ask your friends, if you respect them. Ask people who are in relationships for their feedback.  Get a coach – maybe you need some assistance in achieving what you want. 

Don’t give up – it’s out there for you.

Visit Amy Applebaum at www.bootcampforyourmind.com

Comments

[Danielle]

Thanks sooo much for answering my question! The dating world is so intense and scary, and I really needed some help. I guess I need to figure out exactly what I'm looking for and get serious about it. I may even look into the online dating scene. But if it doesn't work out, expect a call from me!!!